First Date. What to Do?

She agreed to go out with you. Fantastic! Now you just have to make the date count. The truth is that there are a lot more “first dates” than “second dates” and you want to be the guy who leaves her wanting more. With this in mind, here are some simple tips to help you make that first date count:

1. Have A Plan

Whether you want to simply go out for coffee or you want to take her to the trendiest restaurant, make sure you have a clear-cut plan for what the evening will entail. There is nothing a woman is less impressed by than a man who says, “So…what do you want to do?” A bit of planning shows that you’ve put thought into the date, which translates in her mind as having put thought into HER.

2. Keep the Conversation Positive

Nobody wants to spend an evening with someone who is miserable. On the first date, she will be trying to decide if you are someone she can have fun with. So, while nobody’s life is perfect, it would be best not to air all of your woes on the first night together. Doing so is going to give her the impression that by dating you she can look forward to a future of playing therapist. You can tell her your sob stories later. For now, keep things light.

3. Remember Your Manners

Women are observant creatures. We notice the little things. While she may not gush over it, a woman will always notice when a guy holds her door open or when he offers her his jacket on a chilly evening. Sometimes the smallest gestures can leave the biggest impact, and you can bet she’ll be bragging to her girlfriends about all these considerate moves later on.

4. Offer To Pay (And Mean It)

This can be a very tricky moment on a first date. Most women today expect to be treated as equals by the men they date, so the act of offering to pay can come across as condescending. That said, more often than not, a woman wants to know that the first date is not going to end in a one-night-stand, and the offer to pay shows some level of investment on your part. Many women will be charmed by your offer, but occasionally you’ll get a strong, “no”. If you get that “no”, don’t insist, because she may be insulted by your attempt at chivalry.

5. Read Her Signals

You’ve reached the end of the date. You’ve walked her to her doorstep (or her car, if you traveled separately). Now comes the big decision: do you go for the kiss? Here’s where you have to watch her signals. Is she lingering at the door? Did she stop moving and turn her whole body back around to say goodnight? Does she look a bit nervous? These are good signs. She’s waiting for you to make a move. So, if you are interested, go for it!

But, if she only turns her head to say goodnight, or if she seems to be moving fairly quickly, it’s best not to try to get that kiss. This may not be a bad sign – she could just be waiting for the second date. But going for the kiss when she doesn’t want you to can end in either an awkward half-kiss or an embarrassing refusal. Pay attention to her cues. She’ll tell you what she wants. Even if you do everything right, keep in mind that not every date is going to end in a second date. However, if you follow these suggestions, you will up your odds of impressing her, and at the very least you may gain a great friendship out of it. Good luck and remember to have fun!